Friday, December 25, 2009

letting it go....respect & tolerance....happy holidays...

tolerance - sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own

Yesterday...i got into new jersey with my Jewish friend Nahoma. We were driving with her grandparents to see her orthodox family. While talking about this in the car...I started to realize how many rules i had to respect and follow. I couldn't touch her aunt. I had to respect the dress of everyone in the house. I had look at myself and realize how different i would be from them. I entered the house...already scared and uncomfortable. We were greeted by Nahoma's aunt and i accidentally reached to shake her hand. She shook hesitantly and it wasn't until i sat down that i realized what i had done. Ashamed and uncomfortable...i retreated into my mind. I shut out most of what was happening around me. In the car, i noticed that i psyched myself out of a lovely gathering. I let my uncomfortability get to me and THAT was the shameful part. I opened my mouth to talk about this with the family...and i was told to let it go of the guilt. I was told the story of two monks...an old woman was crossing a bridge and a monk lifted her across it to be helpful. Later...another monk asked him how he carried a woman if he took a vow not to touch woman. The man replied...You seem to be carrying her farther than i did.

There are TWO very big points to this blog post...

1. Let things go when they aren't that extreme. Holding on to thousands of meaningless grudges and discomforts starts weighing you down. Makes you a REALLY bitter and argumentative person, among other things. Let things die because its good for everyone.

2. Be respectful and tolerant...if its killing you...we'll talk. Don't let discomfort get in the way of great opportunities either. Sure...people always going to be different than you and that can be terrifying....but don't wear it on your face at the very least. It sends out the wrong message...Diversity is what makes the world go round. Love PEOPLE as a whole...don't judge...
beGolden and have a happy holiday.
Jahmal

2 comments:

  1. I agree...I think these two issues you addressed create the majority of problems in the world. People not doing what you suggest, that is. Sort of just waving at issues as they pass by can be the best thing to do for them. And not making a big deal of things that can be so easily resolved. And respect and tolerance is something that, if everyone practiced it, the world would be a bazillion times better. I'm just saying.

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